A teacher is instructing her fourth grade class, and she's telling them that the word of the day is 'contagious.' She asks if anyone can use this word in a sentence, and several students raise their hands. She picks out Carl.

'My dad told me to stay away from kids with mumps 'cause they're contagious,' says Carl

'Very good,' says the teacher.

Then she picks Suzie, who says, 'The atmosphere was contagious.'

'Excellent, Suzie!' says the teacher. Then she notices that little Johnny has his hand up at the back of the class. 'Yes, Johnny?'

Johnny says, 'The other day, me and my dad's a-sittin' around, and we saw our blonde neighbour painting her fence. She had a tiny little model car paintbrush, and she was going in tiny little strokes up and down the fence, and my dad says to me, 'Jesus, it's gonna take that c**t ages to finish that fence.''