Emily Scott

...wants to buy a guide to this year's World Cup

BUY THE BEST GUIDE TO THIS YEAR'S BIGGEST TOURNAMENT HERE!!!

Emily: But why should I buy this guide, Maxim? What is it that marks this particular tome apart from the crowd?
Maxim: We're glad you asked that Emily. It's becasue one of our main firm ACTUALLY WROTE IT! And it's packed full of the kind of facts we all find dead fascinating about a tournament that still has us totally hooked from the first kick until the last.

Emily: Does it have guides to all the competing nations?
Maxim: Yes!

Emily: Do some famous footballing celebrities impart their favourite World Cup XIs?
Maxim: Yes!

Emily: Do you write about World Cup Legends?
Maxim: Yes!

Emily: Does that include the brilliant Roger Milla, Socrates, Roberto Baggio, Hristo Stoichkov and Johan Cruyff?
Maxim: Oh yes!

Emily: It does sound rather good. Do you touch on anything else of note?
Maxim: Yes! Ultimate World Cup Scandals, Ultimate World Cup Losers, Ultimate World Cup Shirts, Ultimate World Cup Footballs, Ultimate World Cup Mascots, the A-Z of England at the World Cup, England's World Cup Cock-Ups - there's loads of stuff, which is why we called it the "Ultimate Guide"!

Emily: If only you gave away a free wallachart...
Maxim: We do! And you get the chance to win a signed Pele shirt, too!

Emily: Bloody hell! Where do I buy one? I fucking need one NOW!
Maxim: Yes, you do! You buy it HERE, HERE and HERE!

Emily: Thanks Maxim, is it true that it's only £5.99?
Maxim: Yes! Get one for your other half too, yeah? And your dad. And everyone else you know. They'll love it.

Emily: Good idea!
Maxim: Oh, and your boobs are wondeful by the way! We admire them greatly!

Emily: Ahhh, that's sweet, now shove off while I buy my Ultimate World Cup Guide 2010!
Maxim: Okay, see ya Emily!