A giant plundering behemoth has reared its head over the sporting horizon. Steered wrecklessly by a cackling Rupert Murdoch, a slavering Sepp Blatter and a squawking Richard Scudamore, it bobs, smokes and cracks down the gloriously rotten road we all know as the Premier League.
As soon as the fixtures are released some fans (mostly Arsenal from what we could make out on forums) begin to shout “CONSPIRACY!” "FIX!” and “WE’VE BEEN DONE RIGHT UP HERE, DAVE” rather vehemently at their respective computer screens/newspapers. Some can at last begin to book holidays for the forthcoming year. And others simply revel in the joy of an opening fixture at their home gournd. Your team of choice really does depend which of these camps you reside.
In our minds, of the big four Chelsea appear to have the easiest of starts. In his first season at Stamford Bridge, Carlo Ancelotti kicks off in front of his home crowd and avoids his main title rivals until October's home clash with Liverpool. His first difficult away game doesn’t materialise until 28 November, when Chelsea travel to the Emirates.
The champions get the chance to bleed in their Ronaldo replacement at the start of the season with two bankers against Birmingham (H) and Burnley (A) but face a potentially tricky late August and early September facing Arsenal (H), Moneybags City (H) and a banana-skin away trip to Stoke.
The run-in isn’t particularly nail-biting but the penultimate Premiership weekend does feature a mouth-watering (so bring a tissue) clash between Liverpool and Chelsea at Anfield. Could that match be pivotal to either of their title ambitions? Will Manchester United be out of site by then? Will the Prem's southernmost side actually be in Europe by then? And can Jeff Stelling go even one afternoon of Soccer Saturday without mentioning bloody Hartlepool? We shall see. Good luck one and all…
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