Jungle Fever

A small zoo in Alabama acquired a rare species of gorilla. However, within a few weeks, the female gorilla had become extremely agitated and difficult to handle. A vet was called in, and upon examination, he determined the problem. The gorilla was on heat. And to make matters worse, there were no male gorillas of the same species available.
While reflecting on their problem, the park administrators noticed Dave, a trainee zoo-keeper who was responsible for cleaning the animal cages. Dave, like most rednecks, had little sense, but possessed ample ability to satisfy ANY species. On realising this, the park administrators thought they might have found a solution. Dave was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to have sex with the gorilla for 0? Dave showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully.
The following day, Dave turned up for work and announced that he would accept their offer, but only on three conditions. 'First,' he explained, 'I don't want to have to kiss her. And secondly, you must promise never to tell anyone about this.' The park administration quickly agreed to these conditions, so they asked what was his third condition. 'Well,' pleaded Dave, 'you gotta give me another week to come up with the 0.'