Nobleisms

Nando's and Flakes

	“Literally, given the choice I would eat NOTHING BUT NANDO’S.”

Nando’s is a beautiful place. You can buy chicken and have it roasted or in pitta bread [our Ed’s favourite, with cheese, pineapple, and hot sauce] or whatever you like really. Mr Noble is a MASSIVE FAN.

Ross: “Literally, given the choice I would eat NOTHING BUT NANDO’S.”

Maxim: “What do you go for in there?”

Ross: “Everthing. I’ll just go for chunks of chicken. And the wings. And those little nuts. The yoghurt too, out of those mad taps they’ve got. I just love it, it’s the perfect restaurant.

Jimmy Carr right, he’s a dark horse is Jimmy, we went into a Nando’s once and he pulls out this card and he’s got an [incredulous] EAT AS MUCH AS YOU LIKE CARD! Like a Gold Card. So he can just go in there any time he likes and get FREE NANDO’S!

So, at all of my gigs I’ve been trying to mention Nando’s as much as possible. But no-one’s contacted me. I’ll keep on going...”

Maxim: “Is Jimmy allowed to go in Nando’s with a mate and order a meal for them too? Or are they quite strict on the fact it has to be just him.”

Ross: “No, he can feed his friends, too. It’s brilliant.”

If anyone from the chicken delightful restaurant we all know as Nando’s is reading this, or a friend of someone with a bit of sway at Nando’s, then please get in touch. Not for Ross, you understand. We want to give away some Nando’s Gold cards to our beautiful readers and wind Ross up next time we bump into him…

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FLAKES

Ross: “I was doing a gig during the end of my West end run where I was talking about the song, 99 Problems But My Bitch Ain’t One. Well, I've got a different version of it.

I like to pretend that Jay-Z is an ice cream man who has run out of Flakes. Him and Beyoncé are in the van, I go up and say ”Got any Flakes?” and she’s, like, “Nah, sorry” and Jay-Z’s in the background singing 99 Problems….

[Crazy Noble waffle]

Anyway, so I’m doing this 20-minute long skit about it, going off on one about Jay-Z and his ice cream van and his 99 problems. Next thing I know woman from Cadbury’s sent me some Flakes. So I was off me tits on flakes for weeks and weeks and weeks and now to be right honest with ya, I’m finding it quite hard to wean myself off ’em…”