WHAT'S IT ABOUT? The Man of Steel swoops back to earth and finds Lex Luthor waving a kryptonite dildo, threatening to kill billions. A scintillating opportunity for Clark to reassert his super manhood!

ANY GOOD? Spectacular CGI lifesaving and a cooler, ballsier hero. This is the biggest, funnest, most indestructible comeback since bird flu!

QUOTE FOR THE POSTER: 'A blockbuster with watermelon-sized testicles from another planet!'

REASON TO WATCH: Bryan 'X-Men' Singer's smart direction. Better than the weedy, clean-cut Superman flicks you watched while pooing on your potty.