WHAT'S IT ABOUT? Cannibals, paedophiles, female warriors, corrupt cops and pole dancers team-up for brutal, multi-narrative bonanza.

ANY GOOD? Quite possibly the most stylish film ever made. Yes, even more so than Grumpy Old Men 2!

BEST BITS? Jessica Alba's of course. Titter. Also see Mickey Rourke's deranged de-limbing of Elijah Wood, Bennicio Del Toro's impaled head and Rosario Dawson's bondage cossie.

CHARACTERS WE WOULDN'T SNOG: The smelly man with a bright, yellow balloon head. He's full of puss, which guarantees a tangy aftertaste.