Beating the binge

Week 9: Mission complete!

So here we are, the current point, right here and now, where we stand. It's been around 8 months since I decided to turn my life around and become more than a washed-up binge drinker. In that time I've had 5 hangovers and smoke-filled lungs on those 5 nights out – that's it! From 15 years worth of weekends wasted to only 5 festive nights at Christmas. If you knew me beforehand you'd be impressed, to be honest you should still be impressed, as far as I'm concerned I deserve your awe!

In 8 months a lot can happen, as proven by the birth of my flatmate's daughter, who is now 5 months old and very special in my life. My job satisfaction has gone up and down, mainly down, but I've stuck it out rather than trade it in for a crappier job in a futile attempt to improve things. I've started training in a second martial art and physically improved, muscles re-appearing from my teens where there was a sheet of unflattering thirtysomething flab. I've had relations with women since quitting booze and had sober sex on the 1st night of amour with one lady – it was better than drunken fumblings, things worked!

I can taste food now, I can think more clearly and I haven't had that depressing bluesy feel from alcohol withdrawal on a Sunday night. Socialising is easier and I've actually got to meet people from going out and keeping busy.

To begin with it was not that easy I'll admit, mainly because it didn't feel worthwhile for several months. I still felt down and was not getting out and about to change things. That was of course simply my doing, all I had to do was find the kinds of activities I wanted to do and then, you guessed it, do them. For example I enjoy martial arts so found two styles I suit and have been keeping them up far more successfully than regular lonesome jogs around the local park. 

I am chuffed I didn't fail overall, if I had kept drinking I wouldn't be writing this now, I wouldn't be routinely staring down at the little tot currently playing with her toys at my feet, her half moon smile staring back at me worth all the drink in this world. I wouldn't be paying my bills on time and wouldn't have an increasing social circle.  I wouldn't be getting on better at work and I most certainly wouldn't be able to sleep so well at night.

I believe with every passing moment in your life, with every given event there are a vast amount of possible destinies, for some reason I imagine them as a flurry of movement emanating from my own body. With every litle movement, breath and thought these futures are constantly changing. I think destiny really is in our own hand , there will always be inevitable changes in our life for the worse, the loss of a job, family member, crime, it's how we then go from those negative points and change them into positives.  Life is complicated , so much is expected of us these days and there's enough to contend with on a day to day basis that I personally haven't got time for a bad drinking habit.

I will drink again,  I am after all an Englishman!  I want to go out and celebrate and I want to have a laugh, but I've done that in the last 8 months and realised drink is not as important as I thought.  I feel now that everything I am doing is a small step towards a more solid and stable future.  I like to think everything I am doing now is creating an ever stronger platform for me tread as I make my way through life.

Last orders gentlemen please...