Know It All

He's got an answer for everything, week 7

Do fat people produce the most disagreeable flatulence? – Drew, Horsham
A person’s weight isn’t directly connected to what their arse smells like, although overweight people will be inclined to eat more foodstuffs that lead to smellier strains. Fart gas is accumulated when food can’t be fully digested by the stomach and small intestine – essential bacteria in the large intestine then set to work on breaking it down, which creates the malodourous gasses. Onions, dairy products, wheat, lentils, beans and oats contain lots of polysaccharides (a type of carbohydrate), which can’t be broken down easily by the stomach. So sitting next to the fat person, instead of the thin person eating onion bread and drinking a milkshake, is actually a good idea. Especially if you’re on a plane, when the change in atmospheric pressure means everyone farts more than usual.


Will a human ever be born who can swim faster than a shark? – Anon, email
World record holder Eamon Sullivan can swim 50m in 21.28 seconds, averaging 5.26mph. He’d comfortably beat a basking shark (3mpg, so 50m in 37.28s), as would any decent swimmer. No one would stand a chance against the shortfin mako shark though, which has been clocked at 31mph (50m in 3.61s). Even if Michael Phelps mated with a penguin their bastard offspring wouldn’t beat that.


Let’s finally clear this up. Who is more intelligent: men or women? – Dev, Lincs
Men and women are equally intelligent, based on a simple average. Men have a greater variance of IQ: there are higher proportions of men than women with either very high or very low intelligence levels. Despite this, the highest measured IQ was that of a woman, Marilyn vos Savant, who scored 228. Seventy-five percent of intelligence is genetic and 25 percent is due to environment. In the past, societal influences have meant that men have outperformed women in subjects such as maths. Greater gender equality mean this is no longer the case. (Remember, IQ isn’t a percentage: the average is 100. If you claim you’re happy with your score of ’80 percent’. Then your below average score of 80 is well-deserved, you berk.)


What’s the best number for an average player to aim for if they want a decent score in darts? I keep losing – Jason, Bow
This really is just a matter of averages. Below-par players should aim for the 19, 7 and 16 area (total: 42) on the dartboard to score the highest. Steer clear of the dodgy 2, 17 and 3 section (total: 22). Slightly above-average players, who can aim for two sections instead of three, should still head for the 19 and 7 area, whilst avoiding the 6 and 10. Hopeless players should aim for the top half of the board. They will score less than if they aimed for the bottom half, but with the bullseye hung at 1.73m (5ft 8inches), an errant dart is less likely to take someone’s eye out and result in a costly lawsuit.

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